Our Primary sent out a "spotlight" sheet for the kids to fill out. They will use them to spotlight different children throughout the year in church. I want to record and remember their answers. Some expected, some completely on a whim, I think...
Bekah:
I am a boy/girl: girl
I am __ years old: 5
My hair is: light brown
My eyes are: hazel
My favorite food is: oranges, ravioli
Foods I don't like are: string cheese
My favorite book is: Sleeping Beauty
I am good at: cartwheels, coloring, violin
When I grow up, I'd like to be a: a teacher; a princess
My favorite place to visit is: Disneyland
My favorite holiday is: Christmas
My favorite primary song is: "I Feel My Savior's Love
ps... my favorite color is orange!
Abby:
I am a boy/girl: girl
I am __ years old: 5
My hair is: light brown
My eyes are: brown
My favorite food is: Fruit Loops, corn
Foods I don't like are: There is nothing I don't like
My favorite book is: Pinocchio
I am good at: cartwheels, being together with mom
When I grow up, I'd like to be a: A doctor that helps teeth (dentist), a mom princess
My favorite place to visit is: Grandpatty's house
My favorite holiday is: Easter
My favorite primary song is: "I am a Child of God"
Michael:(typed by Michael himself...)
I am a boy/girl: boy
I am __ years old: 7
My hair is: light brown
My eyes are: blue
My favorite food is: Italian food
Foods I don't like are: potatoes
My favorite book is: Magic tree house
I am good at: b~ball
When I grow up, I'd like to be a: b~ball player
My favorite place to visit is: BYU games
My favorite holiday is: Christmas
My favorite primary song is: called to serve
MICHAEL!!!! FRANDSEN!!!!
Oh man, I love these kids.They have such defined personalities.I'm so curious to see how their personality traits pan out over the years.2. Carol Dweck, quoted in Joe Kita, “Bounce Back Chronicles,” Reader’s Digest, May 2009, 95.
Marriage has been on my mind a lot lately. I taught a lesson about marriage this Sunday to the 17-18 year old girls in my church. Talk about a responsibility. What do they need to know/realize/understand as they enter the world of prospective men and a lifetime/eternity of that is so contingent on the decisions they will make in the next decade or so of their lives? What could possibly prepare them, shield them, and arm them as they go out into the battlefield of love, lusthounds, and lame-os?
Divorce rates are high. So many issues are splitting people apart. So many misgivings are bringing people together. What makes marriages work? What really matters in marriage for now and forever??
When it came down to it during Sunday's lesson, I realized right away that I had less time than I needed to share all that I had prepared. On the spot I had to decide what was most important. In addition to a lot of doctrine about temple/celestial marriage, I felt the need/responsibility to impart some of the lessons I have learned from experience. I want to document it to remind me to share with my daughters then they (gulp) are 17-18 themselves.
1. You can love people you don't end up marrying. (A.k.a... you don't have to marry him just because you love him.) I had a lot of serious relationships in high school/college. There was a lot of caring and a lot of love. But love only one ingredient to starting a happy marriage.
2. You can let someone go, even if he has good "potential." (A.k.a... you don't have to marry him just because he's a good guy and he can take you to the temple.) In college, somehow I ended up engaged to someone I didn't even really like in the beginning. He filled the "checklist" I had made in church as a 13-year-old girl. But "the checklist" is only one ingredient to starting a happy marriage.
3. You should want to give, and you should feel given to. So much of marriage is about shedding your selfishness. In these years of being a wife and mother, I am still a naturally selfish person. Given, most of the things I "want" are usually good, functional things... but I can let my present "needs" or "ideals" override the big picture of what is really important. How can I be so short-sighted and blinded by my own petty desires?? Learning to be selfless is a huge ingredient to a happy marriage.
4. Once married, be prepared to WORK. (A.k.a... it ain't all roses.) I love Paul so madly, care about him deeply, and we know each other so thoroughly. Yet it can be a challenge to make sure I am communicating these feelings so that he knows it amidst all the bustle a busy, sometimes frenzied life. Being a parent takes work. Running a household takes work. Providing for a family is work. But in all that work, there should still be energy left over to work on having a good marriage. Somehow, I can let my need for order, a clean house, a schedule, sleep, etc. etc. etc. override tender feelings for him. It takes deliberate caring and affection. WORK is a key ingredient to maintaining a happy marriage. And I'm still working on this one... :) In my preparations, was reminded of my favorite quotes about marriage. When I did marriage counseling, I practically had these memorized because they applied to every person with marriage issues that ever came in for help.
They are both from Gordon B. Hinckley:
"If every husband and every wife would constantly do whatever might be possible to ensure the comfort and happiness of his or her companion, there would be very little, if any, divorce. Argument would never be heard. Accusations would never be leveled. Angry explosions would not occur. Rather, love and concern would replace abuse and meanness."
and...
"I am satisfied that a happy marriage is not so much a matter of romance as it is an anxious concern for the comfort and well-being of one's companion."
Any marriage, left untended, can go sour.
I am so grateful for a husband who tends to our marriage. He does so much to "ensure [my] comfort and happiness." Thoughtful and perceptive, he dotes on needs I don't even realize I have. He calms my troubles (some valid and some completely irrational) with "anxious concern for [my] comfort and well-being."
I am so very blessed to be a partner in his tender love for our children and our marriage. His commitment to us fills his day with long hours at the hospital, few hours of sleep, driving carpools, lugging all the kids around with him to run my errands while I scramble to pick up the pieces of my failing order and sanity in the house... the list goes on and on.
Harold B. Lee said "Testimony isn't something you have today, and you are going to have always. A testimony is fragile. It is as hard to hold as a moonbeam. It is something you have to recapture every day of your life.” I would say the same about love in marriage. When you are dating, it seems that your love could sustain every need you would ever have in all of life. As time goes on, the demands of life and your own weaknesses intrude and invade that blissful oasis. The love has to be recaptured each day. I am glad to be reminded of this again and again. I have been privy to many struggles, hardships, and failings of marriages. It is heartbreaking and sad. I have also cheered on marriages that have worked through hard times. I have seen dedication and determination, re-dedication and reconnection. It is forward-looking and hopeful.
All of these thoughts are swirling in my head, helping me to "recapture" that dedication for myself.
Life is so good, even with its struggles and frenzied pace. Even though I may not be able to keep up with my "ideals" and the to-do list, I do need to "keep up" with my husband and lend his "well-being" a little "anxious concern" sometimes.
ahh moab. the day i drove to moab for the event i realized i had not been to moab for 6 years. whoa. this the town i traveled to every few months during medical school. just like that, life took a few turns and i find myself in a great place--and it all happened without visiting moab. well, time to return.
a few months back kevin brooks asked if i was interested in this event. 60 miles and 6,000 feet of climbing? yes please. it was an early spring ride and i thought i could start my spring training earlier than last year (because of board exams.) well, i trained as well as weather allowed...(i'm not in so cal anymore...)
the ride was a lot of fun. it was not USA cycling sanctioned, but it was timed. there was a police escort for the first 25 miles and that allowed a very fast paced peloton to pace along the colorado river with those beautiful sheer cliffs towering on either side. it is situations like these when i can't help but smile stupidly for long periods. it was a bit hectic as all were jockeying to be near the front, but that's what adrenaline is for right?
as the road climbed upwards, i fell off the pace some. i could see the lead group for long stretches of the climb, but ultimately settled into my own pace and enjoyed the scenery and the riders around me. i met riders from north carolina, colorado, moab, salt lake city, and idaho. i was hurting at moments on the climb, but took it in stride as my training this year was not as complete as before last year's big climbing event. that event took place in july though...
This year's numbers prior to the gran fondo...
Count:
19 Activities
Distance:
257.13 mi
Time:
17:02:29 h:m:s
Elevation Gain:
31,033 ft
Avg Speed:
14.9 mph
Avg HR:
155 bpm
Avg Run Cadence:
--
Avg Bike Cadence:
--
Calories:
18,533 C
Last years number prior to the death ride...
Count:
54 Activities
Distance:
1,081.03 mi
Time:
72:43:08 h:m:s
Elevation Gain:
112,681 ft
Avg Speed:
15.2 mph
Avg HR:
151 bpm
Avg Run Cadence:
--
Avg Bike Cadence:
--
Calories:
79,896 C
i reached the king of the mountains after a plateau of rising and falling terrain very similar to the nebo loop. the descent was fast, beautiful and at times sketchy. i found a group of four riders to pace with about halfway down and we flew to the finish with a great sprint to the finish line.
overall i came in 36th and thoroughly enjoyed the event.
enjoy the one-minute video amy calls silly below...
It is Mother's Day... a day that means more to me each year that passes. As my children get older, my heart gets bigger. I care more. I worry more. I am more invested. I have more experience. I have more happy/sad/silly/hard stories. I am tougher than I've ever been. I'm more sensitive than I've ever been. And I'm on my knees more than I've ever been in prayer for the good of these little people I care so very much about.
I want to just record my thoughts in this quiet moment on Mother's Day, when my heart is full of love for my children and gratitude for the opportunity to be a mother.
Michael--my sweet, smart boy. You are so tender and thoughtful, fun and personable. Through the years of dad's medical school and busy residency, you became my friend and buddy. I am so glad it continues to be that way. I enjoy so much your maturing sense of humor and ability to get inside jokes. I love to see your beautiful mind work out how the world works. You are keen and smart in so many ways, including how to be a friend to your mother. Thank you for the love you have for our family and the good way you treat the women in your family.
Abby--my lovely, loving girl. You are full of affection and life. You feel things so deeply, and I love experiencing the excitement of life through your eyes. You make me grateful for hugs and kisses and sweet words. I love the honest way you express your feelings, and the cute ways you explain your thoughts. I learn from your friendly spirit and you bring out the fun side of me. Thank you for loving us so very much. Thank you for always requesting mom to put you to bed. It means a lot to me.
Bekah--my thoughtful, thinking girl. You are always thinking of what to do next. Where to go. What to make. What game to play and whom to invite. I love your constant stream of love notes and pictures. We all love your heartfelt goodbyes and welcome homes. I love your determination to do whatever you think is best, and your desire to do what is best for others. You love to make us all feel loved, and you have a mothering way of treating your siblings that is endearing and sweet. Thank you for caring about us so much.
Ella--my cute, cuddly girl. You are the youngest in our family, and you are adored by us all. You love to hug and be held, and I love that I could cuddle you for hours each day if I only had the luxury of sitting still for hours each day! Your imagination draws us all into your world of cuteness, and I have loved the impromptu songs and dances you have been doing for me this week. You are often the comic relief in the comings and goings of our schedule, and you love to be toted around to whatever is planned for the day. Thank you for being a cute goonie bird.
Paul--my adorable adoring husband. Thank you for being my second wind and my saving grace. I could not be the mother I am without your understanding heart, willingness to help, and ability to infuse us all with your spunk and spontaneity. I appreciate so much all that you do with the kids. You carpool, cuddle and read, and do music practice in a pinch. You manage them better than I do in public, and don't sweat the small stuff. You are the best dad to them, with abilities that bring out the best in all of us. You are a tender and emotionally connected father. You are encouraging in all the right ways. Plus... you are a whole lot of FUN!!! Thank you for valuing my role as mother, and helping me in all the most important ways. I love you.
Thank you to my family for making motherhood a fulfilling, challenging, and happy experience. I love you all!!
After the day of the birthday party, we had a family birthday dinner at Grandpatty and Grandpappy's house.
Grandpatty knows that fun candles and pretty frosting are important to girls...
Bekah...
Abby...
I love having family members love my kiddos. So fulfilling...
Paul taught them about making a wish and never telling it to anyone. Man, what excitement came when they got to make their wish! Abby still hasn't told me hers, but every now and then she'll say something like... "Mom! We got to have our favorite treat tonight! (with a sly grin...) But that wasn't my birthday wish... !!"
Blowing out candles...
And they know our family and share our obsessions...
Also from family members: cool crayons, markers, and paper! Tiny princess jewlry! Books! FUN!
This is the day they got to open their presents from us. Clothes, art supplies... and the thing that I talked Paul into... PAINT!! for their rooms. They got to pick the color, I got to pick the shade. And they were so, so, so excited to paint with mommy. (more to come on that...)
Orange for Bekah... (geesh!)
and purple for Abby...
During all the excitement, Ella decided to busy herself with her own project of changing the toy giraffe's diaper...
She was very serious and deliberate about the whole thing with the wet wipes and all.
Oh, Abby and Bekah... when did you get so old?? Certainly some days it seemed like this time would never come. That I would always be changing your diapers, nursing you, feeding you squishy food, or pushing that clunky double stroller everywhere. Now I am reminding you to flush the toilet, helping you clean the food you spill at each meal, perpetually restocking the markers and paper supply, reminding you to keep your seat belts on, and filling out your kindergarten registration forms. When did it all happen?? 5 just seems too old.
But you don't think so... 5 is just right!! You'd been anticipating birthday number five for months and months. In the fall, I would name all the holidays from Thanksgiving to Valentine's Day, telling you that after the New Year and just before Valentine's Day we would get to celebrate. The cake choices ranged from Sleeping Beauty, Kitties, 5-tiered tall cakes with lots of candles, butterflies, flowers... then finally a few days before the big day... a decision was made: Rainbows. A big rainbow cake for Abby, and lots of rainbow cupcakes for Bekah. Thanks for giving me a couple of days to pull together a rainbow themed day.
But be forewarned that I will try to talk you out of any cake that requires me to mix and make 8 colors of frosting. It just takes too long...
But I didn't mind the extra late night too much. You loved seeing the finished products. And that is always worth it.
(with a "cloud" missing due to Ella's careful fingers...)
You invited some of your funnest friends to celebrate with you. They were a lot of fun.
We played the game you requested to play: Duck, duck goose... but we changed it to orange, orange, purple... your favorite colors.
Grandpatty made delicious flower sugar cookies to decorate in rainbow colors.
Aunt Hannah bought a rainbow of nail polish choices to decorate your fingers and toes.
You requested a dance party and chose your favorite songs. "Halo", "You are my only" (Down), "Single Ladies", and "Broken Heart."
We sang Happy Birthday to you, and your candle blowing was a success!
We enjoyed a rainbow of snacks and opened fun presents.
Then we ended with your most anticipated and favorite activity... a Pinata!!! I hope it all went the way you daydreamed. The rainbow unicorn delighted you both when we found it, and Bekah declared "this is the best ever!" as we filled it with the treats and toys we picked out. You planned for it to be the crowning event at your party... and I think it was!
And if you don't want to watch a bunch of kids whacking away at a pinata, you simply must see what a fun daddy these girls have. After resisting and resenting, Paul finally resigned and in the end REJOICED and fully embraced the joys of the pinata.
Here is a video of pinata time. I'm so glad no one got hurt! Phew! If you don't want to wade through all the kids and their hits, you smiply must go to minute 2:40 to see how Paul finally embraced the spirit of the pinata. :)
No wonder you girls love your Daddy.
I loved seeing you both delight together as you shared your special day. You have become such good friends and special sisters. And while you know which buttons to push to send each other into a whirlwind of fury and emotional madness... you also know each other's favorites, save seats for each other, congratulate each other on the good things you do, and take turns being the princess or the mommy or the baby or the kitty.
As I watch the novelty of a twin sister relationship, I feel a little envious. Being raised as the oldest with 5 younger brothers, I always wanted a sister to pal around with and be friends with. You each declare the other as your best friend, and I always hope it stays this way. You deserve each other, and I hope you always look after each other and remain a blessing to each other.
You are definitely a blessing to me. You've taught me so much about myself. You've blessed me by showing me my weaknesses and giving me chances to make them stronger. You delight in girly things, and have opened up a world that was not fully discovered in a house full of boys... a world of embraced frills and fanciness and fun. We help each other to be emotionally honest, and deal with it all in a hopefully healthy way. I hope we always express and share in ways that help us become better.
Certainly the craziness of twin girls is still rampant in our home. I think I've become resigned to know that it always will be. But with the changing years, there is a change in which joys and challenges you bring. The last 5 years have been quite a ride... I can't wait to see where we're going next!
after 10 years, a blown engine room, discounts and a postponement we finally did it. we celebrated our 10th anniversary in our 11th year of marriage. after the first cancellation it felt like it might never happen. and now that we're home and back in the routine of daily life i doesn't feel like it actually happened (aside from the occasional tricks my balance center plays on me as it tries to pitch my center of gravity forward to counter the coming wave...)
it was a beautiful time. great food. great company. great activities. one of a kind.
thank you amy for a beautiful trip and for 10 beautiful years.
beware of the video...it is longer than 10 beautiful minutes.
two of the neighborhood boys came over to play with ells bells the other day and she took matters into her own hands. i am generally supportive of a healthy sense of self esteem and self defense in my girls and this was great.
she is so cute right now. her favorite part of bowling was the shoes. she's asked about bowling shoes several times since our bowling trip.
today at the grocery store she kneeled in the grocery cart on all fours and said she was a dog. she asked to be driven by different items so she could sniff them and bark at them. for her nap she has a set 'playlist' that i am to sing to her, 'rudolph', 'temple', 'church', and 'child of God'. i love it (and her.)
we were graced with the presence of a production/direction duo of nyc hipsters (stephen and hadleigh) on sunday night when amy and i held our first ever oscars party...it just randomly happened that they were out filming a documentary on the weekend of the oscars and we were lucky to find them at our house during the oscar night magic.
as the kids slowly went to bed one by one upstairs, i printed out the ballots and we fast-forwarded through much of the red-carpet hoopla to more award show hoopla.
our ballots can be seen below. a circle indicates one's preferred winner and a check indicates a prediction of whom the academy will choose. we will compare our award show to that of the academy...
the tick marks at the top of the page indicate the number guessed correctly. the night was tense as we vied for the top predictive position, but it soon became apparent that stephen was pulling away on the strength of his guesses in the shorts and documentarys. i barely pulled from last place to a tie for last with my wife amy (who had only seen 4 of the 9 best picture nominees.)
one caveat before we unveil the winners from our own prestigious academy, 3 of us had seen eight of the nine best picture nominees. amy had seen four. stephen is vowing not to see king's speech on some undefined, undecipherable moral stance. and the winners are...
on the strength of hipster voting, major discrepancies were found. winner of best picture to social network and best director david fincher (also social network.)
i voted for king's speech as best picture and amy voted for toy story (although she cynically predicted that black swan would win the academy's hearts.)
for best actress natalie portman was the unanimous winner in our balloting (although amy abstained not having seen any of the actresses ply their wares.)
and lastly, on the strength of resident highland voters colin firth took home the top male acting prize while the hipsters split for jesse eisenberg and jeff bridges (with a nod to 'the dude'.)
and there you have it. the moment you've been waiting for. do you agree? did the academy get it right. one of the best moments of the night came when trent reznor won an oscar for his score in the social network. it was sad to see the social network flounder so thoroughly. it was a unique and fascinating look at the rise of facebook and its founder that was probably deserving of a few more accolades...
that being said, the king's speech was the best movie i saw all year (followed closely by 'how to train a dragon')
At the beginning of the month, Abby and Bekah premiered at their first violin recital. The past 5 months have been spent learning about posture, bow hold, and fingering. It is a detailed process just to hold everything correctly. Their teacher is Ramona Stirling... and she is wonderful with them. In her 30+ years of teaching, she has never had a set of twins, and we are always experimenting with how to structure lessons and practicing to see what works best.
We are learning the twinkles right now (variations of twinkle twinkle little star), and for the recital they had "polished" some pre-twinkle songs: The E String and A String Concerto, and "I'm A Little Monkey." What fun!
They loved practicing for the recital. They would walk in from the other room... with a very serious face, announce the piece, and play it with various degrees of refinement, and take a deep bow to my applause. It was fun to see the fruits of practice and anticipation displayed on the stage of this little recital hall.
They are lucky enough to have a daddy who can accompany them. They love playing with their daddy.
I was sitting to the side, and should have moved to get better video. You can barely hear a little voice announcing the songs, then Mrs. Stirling (who is sitting right in front) gives them reminders about their posture, etc.
Here is Bekah playing E String and A String Concerto.
Bekah playing I'm a Little Monkey
Abby playing E String and A String Concerto and I'm a Little Monkey
Grandpatty came, and so did Aunt Melinda and cousins Aaron and Baby J. It is always fun to have a cheering section.
As practicing with the kids takes up more and more of my time, I am realizing the value of having this one-on-one time with them. Time working toward goals. Time being productive. Time doing hard things. Time to motivate and inspire, and exercise patience and long-suffering. It is bonding and it is meaningful.
It varies in success. Sometimes there are tears and grumpy faces, but often there is willingness and excitement. It is always work for me. It is usually emotionally draining. It is always hard to fit it into the schedule... between Michael's cello and piano, and Abby and Bekah (who need separate practices now) it should all take around 3 hours out of my day--and some days it just doesn't happen. Because sometimes we skimp... and sometimes we just skip. But I am always remembering the scripture that by small and simple things are great things brought to pass (Alma 37:6).
I love seeing their confidence bloom. I love cheering for them. I love sharing hard work and success. I love that they love music. And I love that they can make music.
